Shannon writes: My husband, Nathan, refuses to be in the same room as a piece of art I own. It’s a web of smiling baby-doll heads stitched together with embroidery thread. It’s about three feet in diameter and bulges pleasingly out from the wall of my office. Please order him to face the art and gaze upon it for one minute with all the lights on.

Having reviewed a photo of the art, this court sides with Nathan: This thing is a rat king of writhing, entwined phobia triggers. The only thing scarier would be if you actually had a rat king on the wall. (If you’re unfamiliar with this phenomenon, do an image search for “rat king.” But also: DO NOT.) However, because of the hilarious specificity of your request, I do order Nathan to comply with your torturous art-appreciation session. Then remove that thing from any public setting and/or destroy it with fire.

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